Should I be bothered that he does not truly read or comprehend what I write here? Or should I look at it as it does not really matter, as long as he is trying somewhat to be a part of what I am? Love does not mean you have to "get" everything the other one is, does it? You don't need to be "one" all the time. Having separate ideas and different identities is a good thing. Sometimes, having space between each other is healthy. You need to step back, and distance yourself to see and soak in the entire picture. How else are you going to get the panoramic view? And when you get the wholeness of your object, will you then be able to make sound decisions and logical assessments?
So often, I think of turning a new page, starting over or going back to where I was. And this thought becomes impossible the minute I get close to my desire. It's like being in proximity of a raging fire, you get too hot and be clouded by the smoke. You can't appreciate the danger, the lure, or even the beauty of its potential, if you stand within its reach. Break away and then study from afar. If you feel you are still inexplicably drawn, then I hope it will be safe to conclude that, in spite of the risks, what you have is worth keeping, perhaps.
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