love night shadows

I felt you move across my skin in the dark, and thought how I would love to hold you. Wrap you up, so you wouldn’t be able to escape. It’s so perfect what we have, but only when it’s outlined in silhouettes. As soon as the dawn shines onto the bed, you shrink away from me, shed your skin, and take on another form. The sun pulls you out of bed, into your jeans, and out the door. And it throws me, the way we exchange I love you’s while the stars twinkle overhead, but as soon as Helios crosses your path, you forget all of it.

I focus on the next night. You only ever come to me in shadows, and I try to understand that. My friends ask me if you’re real, or just another warped figment of my imagination. I think about that while your fingers trace my earlobe. I try to ask you why, ask you what drags you, what changes you, but the caresses of your work roughened hands distract me and cause the purpose to slip through the spreading cracks in my consciousness.

You’ve underestimated my ability to love. Or perhaps there is another love that awaits you during the day, one who doesn’t know where you go at night or why. One who is suffering the same way I am. The yin to my yang. She may not see me, but she feels my warmth on your skin when you reach her, but she doesn’t, can’t, ask. She can’t bring herself to form the words, just the way I can’t get my tongue to unfurl them. We are parts of your whole. We are pieces of your shattered mirror. We are the unbalanced, unfettered, unwanted shards of memories of your search for perfection. We lay wasted with you, under you, next to you, breathing in the stale air of your mouth. Devouring your naked I love you’s.

Starshine and sunlight kisses taste different to you. I wonder if you clean your palette between courses...üä